Volume CCXXXIII, Number 33   May, 2003    Worcester, Massachusetts    Since 1770

Honorable Mention, 2003 Republican Guard Award for courage


And the winner is . . .

BIG DIG BUNGLER
TURNS TO BAGHDAD


Giant contractor Bechtel hopes it will have better luck with rebuilding Iraq than with this ill-fated bridge project, for which it billed the Big Dig $1.4 billion.

In what had to be the least surprising news story of the week, the Bush Administration, after a worldwide search, announced that it had awarded a contract worth up to $680 million to . . . Bechtel, the politically connected contractor who brought us the Big Dig, six years late and six billion dollars over budget.

It's hard to know if it was that record of achievement that gave Bechtel the edge in the secret and uncompetitive bidding process presided over by proconsuls like Don "Shorty" Rumsfeld. According to TomPaine.com, however, Little Napoleon III has been carrying Bechtel's water in Iraq since the 1980's, when he tried to persuade his ally to hire Bechtel to build a pipeline. The name of that ally was, you may recalll, Saddam Hussein. To check out the whole sordid tale, click here.

It is of course pure coincidence that Reagan's Secretary of State is a Bechtel director and Ron's Secretary of Defense, Caspar "Nolo Contendere" Weinberger, was General Counsel. It is equally fortuitous that Bechtel's CEO and owner, Riley Bechtel, has done plenty of heavy lifting for the Bush Administration and California Republicans.

Supposedly the money will be used for improvements to infrastructure and construction of schools and hospitals; in other words, for all the things the Bush Administration won't pay for in the U.S.

But some wonder how much Bechtel will be getting and what your money will buy. The initial contract is for $35 million, but the total is expected to escalate to $680 million, which sounds like the typical cost overrun on a Bechtel job. Hell, that kind of money wouldn't buy a guard rail on the Bechtel-mismanaged Big Dig, but maybe it'll pay to push some Iraqi tanks off the highway.

Bechtel's record of getting away with wasting billions in Boston has been extensively documented by the Glob, as has been Bechtel's cozy relationships with former Republican hacks like Bill "Happy Hour" Weld.

Of course, Boston is a long way from Washington, at least in the narrow minds of the Bushies, so it's possible that Bechtel's sorry record on the Central Artery project isn't well known in Washington.

After all how could the U.S. Agency for International Development, a branch of the State Department, be expected to follow obscure construction overruns in far off New England?

It's not as if USAID Administrator Andrew Natsios, who awarded the contract, had any contact with the Big Dig project. Except for the years he spent as Highway Commissioner in Massachusetts – running the Big Dig.

 
Hacky Carp
Patriot • Columnist

After four weeks of war, who's laughing now?

I've been watching the U.S. Army chop up the Iraqi army like a Cuisinart, and after four weeks of slaughter, all I can say is: who's laughing now?

Those chablis-chugging liberals won't admit it, but those bombs and bullets all added up to one thing: George W. Bush and Schlox News Network were right all along. Sure those Brattle Street liberals are crying into their latte but real Americans can't help but bust their buttons with pride when they see how many kills our boys and girls racked up in Iraq. Ruined buildings, smoking tanks and Iraqi corpses all add up to one thing and one thing only: victory for George.

Now those liberal cappuccino-guzzlers [Weren't they drinking latte a minute ago? – Copy Ed.][Forget it, he's on a roll – Ed.] are whining about a few brass idols lifted out of some Iraqi "art" museum. Boo hoo. Do you think down in Crawford, Texas, they're losing any sleep over a few mummies? I don't think so.

So stop sucking down the chardonnay you miserable Saddam-loving liberals and admit it: you and your friend Saddam were just pounded into the sand by the Army, Navy, Air Force and Marines. I hate to gloat [You do? – Copy Ed.] but I'm splittin' my sides here.

Those espresso-sipping liberals were saying Iraq would be a quagmire and American lives would be lost needlessly. But guess what? Only 128 American troops dead! I tell you, I can't stop laughing.

And I don't want to hear from you champagne-quaffing liberals a lot of sob stories about innocent Iraqis killed or injured by stray bombs or cross-fire. Saddam would have killed a lot more of them. Just remember: you can't make an omelette without breaking legs! [Surely, eggs? – Ed.]

 


Thousands of anorexia-crazed zombies rampage through suburban Boston on Patriots' Day, pages 27 through 142
US military supremacy "unchallenged" concludes fair and balanced Fox News Channel, page 143.
Military action against North Korea futile and counterproductive, US decides, page 144.
Gasbag alert level on all-news cable channels reduced to "very annoying," page 186.
Laffs begin at 40: Conan O'Brien to celebrate 40th birthday by telling a joke, page 203.
The best of Partisan Review's B.U. years: a sumptuous one-page retrospective, page 231.


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